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Grab your face masks and hand sanitizer, folks! For the uninitiated, day drinking is a time honored tradition of the retired, remote workers and generally sad people. If this is your first time, don’t be shy! The world of day drinking is exciting, unpredictable and joyously irresponsible. Worry not, we’re going to get you on the boozy track to a worry-free way to see these tough times through. So what are you waiting for? Let’s cruise through this thing, one drink at a time with your guide to day drinking during a pandemic!
Here’s Your Guide to Day Drinking During a Pandemic
Here’s the deal, you should always drink responsibly. But from time to time, the situation warrants a little more than just a good old Brandy nightcap. We’re talking about a global pandemic here, people! This is no time for moderation, just ask the toilet paper warlords and the Lysol wipe bandits. Now that we’ve got you on board, here’s everything you need to know about your guide to day drinking during a pandemic.
We’ve got plenty of helpful drinking tips for the parents suffering their way through isolation right now. But, if you haven’t got little roo’s at home, sip your first drink and experience the train wreck of cabin-fever induced mayhem. A day in the life, if you will.
Desperate times call for desperate measures, so here we are! We most certainly don’t recommend following this schedule to a tee. In other words, drink at your own pace, and don’t over-do it! You see, a 5pm hangover only defeats the purpose of day drinking. Proper buzz management is an artform. We’ll take you through the day, one sip at a time.
Day Drinking During a Pandemic: Too Early
Mornings are for quiet reflection, and planning your day. Not here they aren’t! You haven’t lived until you’ve been woken up by a toddler stepping on your face at 5:00am sharp! (How are they so consistent every morning??) Irish cream, vodka and champagne are going to be our best friends while the sun rises. In other words, Irish Coffee, mimosas, and Caesars. (Not Bloody Marys, those are for breakups). By now, you should have had time to pour yourself a drink and process just how much of an onslaught lies ahead. Here are our suggestions:
Suggested Booze: Irish Cream / Vodka / Champagne
The Pensioner: Irish Coffee, (hot or iced)
If you’re looking for a warm, friendly and reassuring start to your day an Irish coffee is sure to do the trick. Irish cream is a delightfully easy-drinking way to make your morning just a little easier. A little boost of caffeine, and the soothing sensation of creamy liqueur. This relaxing friend makes it just a bit easier to stay in. Don’t forget to hassle your grandkids for their movie/tv streaming service logins!
If you want a real treat, you will want to try our delicious Bailey’s and Kahlua Boozy Dalgona Whipped Coffee. This is the drink for those of you that feel the guilt of drinking too early. With this whipped and creamy dessert coffee, you won’t even realize you’re drinking.
The Seasoned Professional: Cesar, (Don’t skip on the rimmer and celery just because nobody’s watching!)
If you’re a Cesar person, you’re in luck! These juicy tomato cocktails are great for recovering from the night before, and kicking off another long day! They’re savory, spiced and delightful. See? You’re getting your vegetables in. Good on you!
The Homeschooler: Mimosa, (Cheap champagne, fancy orange juice)
You think coffee is the quickest way to get your blood pumping? Think again! Champagne is the Red Bull of champions, and the power of orange juice makes it almost unstoppable. This sugary sweet and bubbly cocktail is like an energy drink for your soul!
Day Drinking During a Pandemic: Mid Morning (Aka ‘Homeroom’)
You’re only just realizing what a disaster this day is about to become. If you haven’t opened the gates to the Homebrew homeschool yet, now’s the time! Where’s that email from the teacher, again? Now, as a burgeoning educational neophyte you need to be nimble and A few drinks in and you’ll be crumpling up practice quizzes shouting, “I’M THE TEACHER, NOW!”
Here are our suggestions:
Suggested booze: White Wine / Vodka / Rum
SAHM: The boxed white wine you already have
You started panic buying not when the toilet paper started running out, but when you heard classes would be suspended. Keen and on-the-ball, you raided the wine aisle before you even reached for the cleaning supplies. Boxed wine is portable and pourable. Easy to stock up on, and even easier to drink. Cheers!
“Do You Speak to Your Teacher That Way?”: Vodka Limoncello
This cocktail is as easy to make as it is to drink. Pro tip: You can batch this one ahead of time in a jug, or dispenser for quick refills! Did you know that making up book report answers gets easier with every sip? I do.
Los Couchsurfer: Cuba Libré
These mix up faster than a Netflix preview starts playing, if you needed any other reason to enjoy rum before 10am. Strategize your long, hard day of streaming and binge-watching with this well loved 3-ingredient cocktail. Do we have any nacho chips left?
Day Drinking During a Pandemic: Afternoon/Evening
Why did we group these two together? Because time doesn’t really factor in any more. Ever notice how when you start early in the morning the day kind of just happens on its own? Weird. You’ll need something simple and reliable to see you through the rest of the day. Planning a family meal, as if there was anything new to talk about. Or cleaning the floor, again. Ease into the evening with these sips. Whether you’re dancing alone with your Google Home, or dolling out ration snacks like it’s wartime, these will see you through! Here are our suggestions:
Dancing in the Dark: Manhattan
Class it up a little, and hit the kitchen with the best moves you’ve got. You might not be able to go out, but the glow of the microwave clock is all you need! Tonight, baby, you’re the star! Crank up your favorite playlist and really let loose! No need to call a cab tonight, you’re closer to home than you think. Remember to always talk nicely to your smart speaker, and Facetime it for added enjoyment!
Casual Friday: Tom Collins
This is a sweet and succulent cocktail you won’t be able to put down. It’s perfect for the afternoon Zoom meeting ft. your least favorite co workers. Why a Tom Collins? Served in the glass of the same name, it looks like a tall glass of water. With any luck, your team will just think you’re really parched! Pro Tip: Mix the next one each time Zoom disconnects, and invest in a large green screen (Trust me). Pants are optional.
The All Nighter: Beer
The funny thing about this whole quarantine is that for some it’s just business as usual. Seriously though, who am I to judge? You already know what your favorite brew is, and it’s probably in the fridge right now. Crack a cold one with the boys and gear up for a long shift of gaming, or maybe even a video conference board game if you can be bothered! Familiar and reliable, beer is there even when Netflix is out of good shows.
That’s just about it for your guide to day drinking during a pandemic! Whether you’re just cruising through the day, or taking it one slap in the face at a time… We’ve all got to get through this thing together. Let us know which one is your drink of choice during these troubling times. And out of an abundance of caution, pace yourself!
How did you like this guide to day drinking during a pandemic? Let us know in the comments below!
Other Guides to Check Out
If you liked this guide, check out some of our other guides, below!